My Rule for Life

I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there is.

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Dear Abbey!!!!!!

Subject: Dear Abbey

Dear Abby,

I am a crack dealer in Paducah, KY who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Bowling Green.  One of my sisters lives in Taylorsville and is married to a transvestite.  My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Louisville.  I have two brothers: one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Eddyville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute, who currently lives in Lexington. She is still a part time "working girl".  All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiancĂ©' and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her.

Should I tell her about my cousin from Ashland, who is an Obama supporter?


Signed,
Worried About My Reputation


Have a nice Day!
Pops

7 comments:

Spitfire said...

Dear Worried,
For goodness sake, let's don't scare the poor girl away! If you truly love her, you can just wait until later in the relationship to tell her about your cousin....or just make sure she never meets cousin. But I see no reason to torment her for no good reason......

LOL! That was hysterical. Shabbat Shalom, Pops dear.

ABNPOPPA said...

ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL REPLY

Rolling on the floor here in Ohio!!!

Good morning Spitfire and what a way to start my day!!!

LOL LOL LOL LOL

MightyMom said...

Bwahahaha

Most Rev. Gregori said...

Dear Worried,

If the poor dear is engaged to you with all of the skeletons in your family closet, I doubt that having an Obama supporter in the family will cause her much distress.

Besides, openness and honesty right from the beginning is the best thing to cement a relationship.

Abbey

P.S.

Do us all a favor and don't have any children.

God Of Bacon said...

Most amusing.

This is made extra funny by the fact that there really are families as you described.

The Local Malcontent said...

That post is a 'hoot'!
And no, no reason at all to introduce the bride to that ne'rdowell from Ashland, the Obama supporter.

See ya, Pops~!

Z said...

REALLY good one, pops! (how're you?xxx)
It is embarrassing to think ANY American voted for Obama considering they already knew he was a liar and had no experience and nobody knows WHO paid for Harvard..to name only a few of a thousand objections normal Americans would have!?
Did you read my piece on Mr. Z's TIES? I think you'd like it...about 8 down the scroll at my place.
All the best, my friend. Z

Lutheran Pastor Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Destruction of the embryo in the mother's womb is a violation of the right to live which God has bestowed upon this nascent life. To raise the question whether we are here concerned already with a human being or not is merely to confuse the issue. The simple fact is that God certainly intended to create a human being and that this nascent human being has been deliberately deprived of his life. And that is nothing but murder.

Read more about this famous Lutheran Pastor at:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dietrich_Bonhoeffer